Friday, November 28, 2008

Strike a Pose

Thanksgiving night, November 27, '08

I was on a Civil War battlefied, where a skirmish had just ended. Confederate General Robert E. Lee was posing for a photographer; Lee had his arm around a life-size cardboard cutout of Union General Grant. The photographer had the full 19th-century setup: the big, bulky camera, a wooden tripod, etc. I approached General Lee and said, "While we're at it, you should have your picture taken with General ___ [who is down the hill from us]." Lee said, "That's a good idea."

*****

I wish I could remember the other general that I mentioned to Lee, but I can't. I should keep a pad of paper next to the bedside table.

This dream may have been influenced by the three different desserts that I ate at Thanksgiving dinner, but a few other things filtered in. First of all, we had supper at our neighbors' house, and we were joined by a full-size cardboard cutout of President-elect Barack Obama. Aside from that, my wife and I were recently rearranging some of our bookshelves, and she commented on the number of Civil War books that we own. In fact, I had a pretty terrifying dream a few weeks ago that I was a Confederate soldier in the midst of battle, surrounded by Union forces on both sides. I was cognizant of the fact that I was shooting and killing people indiscriminately -- not because I had any beef with them as individuals, but simply because I was trying to survive. Pretty disturbing stuff.

Finally, a few weeks ago I was reading a book by Brian Lamb of C-Span called "Life Stories." It's a collection of interviews from his "Book Notes" program, in which he interviewed authors who had written biographies of famous Americans. The point is to whet one's appetite to seek out the full-length bios and learn more about these fascinating people. Anyway, I learned that while General Lee was a man of average height, say, 5'10, he had tiny feet. His boots were size 4, which equates to a modern size 6. Mabye that bit of trivia mixed with the cardboard cutout of Obama to make this dream. How odd.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Copernicus / Taxi

Friday night, November 14, 2008

Dream 1: Copernicus

I was concerned about possibly being laid off from my job, and was trying to figure out what to do about my future. I needed some advice, so I decided to go and talk with a local priest. He was the principal of a Catholic school in town, and both he and the school had a good reputation. I arrived at the school, took a seat outside his office and waited for my turn to see him. The walls outside his corner office seemed to be made of painted cinderblocks, and contained large photos of the priest speaking at a graduation ceremony; he was a Caucasian man, probably in his late 30s, with black hair, and he was a little shorter than I am. Truth be told, he reminded me a little of Tige Andrews from "The Mod Squad." Another wall contained his resume, painted in large black letters, in case anyone wanted to know.

As I waited in line, two women sat to my right. One of them leaned over and said, "Excuse me, do you know how to spell Copernicus?" I spelled it out for her, and she was quite impressed. She smiled, shook her head and said, "Wow. That's amazing."


Dream 2: Taxi

My wife, our friend Arina and I were in our blue 2007 Honda Fit, and were heading out to get breakfast at a local restaurant. The Fit in the dream was identical to the real thing except for one thing; the Fit in the dream had Internet access, and allowed me to type on the right front door.

I pulled over to the curb because I had an e-mail that I just had to type, and it was going to take a while. My wife and our friend were not amused, so they got out and took a walk around some sort of outdoor craft fair, or festival. I typed and typed and lost track of time. Finally, I came to my senses and drove around looking for the other two; I was getting really hungry. By that point the weather was warm, and I happened to have the windows down, so as I approached them I heard my wife say,
"This is ridiculous. We should just go home and get something to eat." I stopped right next to the curb where they were standing and my wife said sarcastically, "Our taxi's here." She and Arina got in -- Arina in the front, my wife in the back. To my surprise, two other large women filed into the back seat as well. I leaned over to Arina and said out of the corner of my mouth, "Who are those people?" She shrugged: "I don't know!" but laughed -- she thought it was hilarious. Apparently the other women heard my wife's comment, and thought I really was driving a taxi, and my wife didn't try to disabuse them of this notion. My penance was to have to drive the strangers to their destinations, with Arina laughing the whole way.

*****

Dream 1: Copernicus

I knew that Copernicus was a renowned scientist of the Renaissance, but had no idea that he was also a Catholic cleric. That's interesting.

My wife and I began watching "Spartacus" on Netflix DVD last night. I wonder if I thought of Copernicus because so many people in that film had somewhat similar names: Spartacus, Crassus, Gracchus, Batiatus, Glabrus, etc.

The Chop

Sunday night, 8/3/08, in Maine

It was the present day, and I was in a western mining town, where archaeologists were excavating an old graveyard. I saw a few guys moving old coffins and stuff. The top layer of ground was littered with coal. I had my ax with me, so I thought I'd help out. I swung it over my head and into the ground -- "THUNK!" It hit something hard. I called out, "I've got something!" and several guys came running. I lifted up a cool old tombstone, made of wood. After the excitement of that abated, I looked down where I was digging and was horrified. Yeesh. I saw two open coffins with skeletons in them. One was laid out vertically at my left. The occupant was still wearing some 19th century clothes, but he was a bleached white skeleton. The same was true for another burial at my right. Furthermore, the man to my left had a big hole in the back of his skull. I wondered, "Was the poor fellow shot, or did I do that (with my ax)?"

Friday, August 15, 2008

The Mood Strikes

Wednesday night, July 30, 2008, in Maine

The Andy Griffith Show's Aunt Bee was marrying some young stud with black hair. He was under the impression that he was supposed to make some speech outside, behind the church, when I realized that everyone was inside, waiting to begin; we were holding up the proceedings. We entered the back of the church and ran full speed down long corridors before the groom entered the church itself, and sprinted down the aisle (from the altar to the front entrance), all the while to the applause of the guests. He entered a room where Aunt Bee was and shut the door, but he must have asked her to have sex with him then and there, because I heard her say in an embarrassed voice, "Jeffrey! On a Saturday?!"

*****

In & Out / Castles Made of Sand / Thugs

Monday night, July 28, in Maine

Dream 1: In & Out

The Police were playing an arena show on their current reunion tour, and they had asked me to join them for the evening. I think I was the second guitarist. When the show ended, I glanced over at Sting and said, "No encore?" He said, "No, that's it." I followed them down a corridor to their dressing room, where I saw lots of fresh meat and fish laid out for them on the counters, resting on tin foil. I was impressed, and exclaimed, "Look at this!" Then I noticed my boss, Jennie S., standing and waiting for the band.

Dream 2: Castles Made of Sand

I was making a sand castle at the beach, and was digging a hole underneath that got deeper and deeper. As I did so, I had an idea: maybe sand castles could be used as forts for our military personnel. Tom Brokaw heard about my plan, and came out with a camera crew, to test the walls of my creation for durability.

Dream 3: Thugs

I was preparing for another card game in my parents' basement, and a few friends had already arrived. Suddenly, a 1950s-era Frank Sinatra strolled in through the basement door, with one of his tough guys -- apparently he was Sinatra's bodyguard. This guy was a real goon, right out of 1940s mob movie central casting. Frank's appearance turned me off, and I said, "I don't feel like playing." I turned around and placed an L.P. on my stereo. Sinatra was annoyed, but he got the hint. He said, "O.K., we'll only play ONE HAND." Everyone sat down at the table as Frank dealt the cards.

*****

Ill Gotten Gains

Wednesday night, July 22

Some pretty rough-looking characters were involved in a poker game, and there was a lot of money on the table. One of them, Robert De Niro, turned out to be an undercover cop, who busted the rest. At the end of the day, he wasn't much better than the other guys; I saw him grab fistfuls of cash and stuff them between the buttons of his long, black winter coat.

*****

Designing Woman

Tuesday night, July 21

I'd heard that my old friend Denise was working at a business in Falls Church, so I thought I'd look her up. I walked in and said, "Is Denise P. here?" She said, "Yes, she works here; she designs couches." She wasn't in at the moment.

*****

I think Denise has a new last name, hence the P. I still haven't seen her since she was 18. She turned 40 last May.