Thursday, January 31, 2008

Braggart

Wednesday night

I was seated in the back of an auditorium, next to a coworker, one of the 20-somethings. The seats were pretty close together, so I was actually leaning on her. She sat to my left. She turned to me and said, "I have arthritis (in my shoulder)" so I apologised, and sat up straight. To my surprise, she leaned over and rested her head on my left shoulder. We struck up a conversation, and soon I found out that she was a fan of Bruce Springsteen. I told her that I was not only a fan, but that I knew Springsteen, and the last time he was in town, I'd had the opportunity to wander around the stage as the band was playing. A few minutes later, we were still waiting for the presentation (or whatever it was that we were there to see) to begin, so I wandered down to the front of the auditorium, and began playing an electric piano. The crowd was watching me, but I was mainly trying to impress my coworker. I began to play Springsteen's "Streets of Fire," from his album "Darkness on the Edge of Town," and I was considerably rusty, so I botched it.
Not long after that, I walked up to take my seat, only to find that a midget woman had taken my place. I was pretty p.o.'ed about it, but my coworker said, "She didn't mean it -- it must have been some kind of mistake." Eventually I found a seat several rows down, closer toward the center of the room. Later, at the end of the workday, I went home to my apartment, and passed a large, rolled-up Springsteen poster that I'd been meaning to get framed. It was printed in black and white, and featured an alternate photo from the "Born to Run" cover session. Both Bruce and Clarence were laughing and having a good time.

*****

"Darkness on the Edge of Town" is my favorite Springsteen album, and I did play "Streets of Fire" on the piano last night when I got home from work, but it was nothing to write home about. I was able to briefly meet Springsteen twice in one week in August of 1984, but he surely woudn't know who I am. Basically, I chased him down for autographs, once in the street near the Bayou Club in Georgetown, and once at his hotel in D.C. Photogrphaer Eric Meola recently published a book of photos from the "Born to Run" cover session, so the poster must have materialized from images I've seen in that book.

By the way, as far as the dream was concerned, I really had been on stage with the band in the past, and I was remembering it as I related the story to Ms. 20-something. I was showing off, but wasn't lying. No such thing ever happened in real life.

I have no idea whether the coworker in question likes Springsteen, but she's far too young to have arthritis. Now, I wouldn't be surprised if I have some arthritis in my shoulders...

Money, Money, Money

Tuesday night

I was in an antique shop, and the proprietor, a woman in her 50s or 60s, was rolling back a set of Space Saver shelves to show me a collection of figurines, or porcelain statues. They were all encased in glass boxes, and there were rows and rows of them. They were pretty impressive, so I called my boss over. (She was in the store, too.) I said, "Hey, Jennie -- take a look at this!" She came down the aisle, had one look, and said, "We'll split the revenue on all of those."

*****

This dream probably wouldn't be funny to anyone but me. It mixes my interest in antiques (although I'm not really into little statues and stuff like that) with the stresses brought on by work. Part of my job is to track sales of all of our reps into certain special sections. Sometimes those sales are split between sales reps and account managers. It's Jennie's job to come up with new ideas to generate revenue. Therefore, the gist of this dream is that Jennie's always thinking about ways to drive revenue, even when she's in an antique shop; it never stops.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

New Dad Jitters

Monday night

My brother Jimmie and sister-in-law Dawn were expecting their first child, and Jimmie was nervous. He realized that with the big day coming soon, he only had a few weeks left before he had to crack down and be serious, so he went out and got a Mohawk haircut. It was high and thick and dyed jet black, and looked stunning; in the front, anyway. It stopped abruptly in the middle where his hair was thinning, but resumed on the back of his head.

Jimmie invited me to visit with him in the backyard of his house, and we were sitting on a patio in some metal chairs, next to a round table. He seemed agitated. He said, "I won't even be able to communicate with the baby for two years!" I told him that it was going to be fine. He said, "What will you say to the kid?" I said, "What do you mean?" He said, "You'd better be careful..." and motioned for me to follow him. He led me around the corner, where, to my surprise, I found that a long wall in the back of their house had been turned into a display of stores, resorts and individuals who had been sued by Dawn. There were examples of broken products, tales of broken promises, etc., all nicely mounted on a blue wall, surrounded by graphics in large white type. The bottom of the wall was nicely landscaped, with gravel separating the wall from the walkway. The implication was that I'd better watch what I say, or I could be the next exhibit.

*****

Wicked, but funny. For the record, I am unaware of thinning hair on the back of Jimmie's head, or of any litigious activities instigated by Dawn. They are expecting their first child, and I did speak with Jimmie last night. I think he does have a case of new-dad nerves, which is normal, but it's going to be OK.

Sunday, January 27, 2008

New Digs

Friday night

My wife and I decided to move back to Arlington, and found a nice big house back in the Country Club Hills section, a few blocks behind Washington Golf and Country Club. The new place was made of brick, but was several stories tall, and had a lot of wooden paneling inside.

Shortly after getting back to town, I found myself playing another board game, this time with Tom S.

*****

I must have board games on the brain this week. I knew one or two people who lived back in Country Club Hills when I was in elementary school. Even then, their parents would have had to be making the big bucks. Tom S. was, and presumably still is, a long-haired joker. He played baseball for Arlington Optimists for awhile, so he was my brother Andrew's teammate on at least one occasion. I vividly remember Tom and another long-haired fellow, Peter H., sitting behind me in my 4th grade class, calling out in a stage whisper, "Hey! (My name) -- What's a vagina?" Charming. I hadn't seen Tom for years when he showed up in Ocean City, MD during beach week following my high school graduation in 1980. I haven't seen him since. I wonder if he's a derelict, or a short-haired banker?

The Duel

Thursday night

My old friend Sam F. and I were the last players left in a game of Monopoly. Both of us had plenty of cash, but he owned Boardwalk and Park Place and had a hotel on one of them. I needed some luck as I was about to pass through that section of the board.

*****

I'll see Sam again soon when I travel up to VA to play in the first round of this year's poker tournament. He and I met in 3rd grade, in 1970.

Of course, one must build up houses and hotels equally on monopolies, so it wouldn't really be possible to have a hotel on just one of his properties.

On Location / 2 Johnnys / Downturn / Poodle?

Wednesday night: a rare 4-dream bonanza

Dream 1: On Location

David Letterman was taping an episode outdoors, at some sort of festival, near the sea, or perhaps, a lake. Suddenly, word got 'round that the actor Heath Ledger had died unexpectedly, so a nighttime tribute concert was hastily planned. The camera focused in on former "Today Show" host Jane Pauley and Dave, who were earnestly playing a duet on acoustic guitars. Pauley was seated closer to the camera, with Letterman beside her, to her left. He had a tear rolling down his cheek. Later, Dave was back to his old antics, dressing in strange costumes, and making up funny bits while talking with beach-goers and vendors. At one point he seemed to be dressed in a navy blazer, a white sailor's cap, and white bell-bottom trousers with a psychedelic print.

Dream 2: 2 Johnnys

A 1960s-era Johnny Carson was standing on a stage in a small theater in the round, surrounded by a studio audience. He said, "If you go to the Grand Ol' Opry, this is what you're gonna' get." At that moment, Johnny Cash made his way through the crowd to great applause, and joined Carson on stage. Cash was carrying an acoustic guitar, and the two Johnnys played a duet, with Carson backing Cash by standing and playing an electric piano.

Dream 3: Downturn

My wife and I were in dire financial straits, so we decided that she would temporarily move in with her sister's family (in order to save money), and I would move back into the townhouse I used to share on Hyson Lane in Falls Church, VA. When I got there, the place was a mess. Oh, it was probably the same as it always was; the change was that after being married for several years, I could now tell the difference between a clean house and a messy one. I had a lot of work to do. Dust was everywhere, particularly on the kitchen counters and in the bathtub in the basement, which looked as if it hadn't been used since I left. I had lots of cabinets to move back into the rooms that I had once occupied. After that, I'd have to roll up my sleeves and get busy transforming the place.

Dream 4: Poodle?

My wife and I were vacationing in France, and were renting an apartment during our stay there. We were out shopping in an open market area, but we had an agreement that we would try to stick to our budget, and not go overboard. Before long she spent $400 on something, and I wasn't too pleased about it, but I kept quiet. A while later, we came upon two guys standing in a booth. They were selling chocolate-colored poodles. They weren't toy poodles; they were mixed with something else, so that they had wiry fur, but they would grow to be larger, about the size of a lab, with a somewhat-square head. The mother of the puppies was there, and seemed to be a very friendly dog. One of the men said that the adult dog was owned by his brother-in-law. Again, I thought that the dogs were friendly, but I've never much liked poodles, and I wasn't in the market for a dog anyway. My wife had other ideas. Before I knew it, she'd picked up one of the puppies and fallen in love with it. She stood behind their stand, holding the dog, and asked me to sign the ledger, sealing the deal. I was hesitant to do so, due to my ambivalence about the whole thing, but especially since the guys had seen how attached she was to the dog already; they began jacking up the price, adding this and that to the bill. Finally, one of the guys said that the total would be $457. I thought that that was just too much money, so I refused to go along with it. I turned to my wife and said, "That's a lot of money for buying something on a whim. You'd better sign this (if you really want this dog)." She did, and she was so happy to have her new puppy. We began walking back to our apartment, and soon, somehow, the new dog transformed from a puppy to a 6-year old French boy with dark hair. The vendors weren't selling dogs at all; they were selling children. At first, I was really put out by this turn of events. I said to my wife, "You realize that you just completely changed our lives. We'll have to figure out schools and everything." But as we walked a little further, I thought to myself, "We have transformed our lives... for the better!" I imagined calling friends and family to tell them that we're coming home with our new son. As we got closer to our apartment, we realized that the vendors must live in the same neighborhood. The boy was good-natured; he put both arms out at his sides with palms up and said (in French-accented English) "I thought I was going to America, but we're going back toward our apartment." I made sure that he understood that we were going back to pack up our things, then we'd all travel home, together. I said, "You'll like America. It's so big!"

*****

Dream 1: On Location

Both Jane Pauley and David Letterman are natives of Indianapolis, Indiana, and I've seen her on his show on several occasions, though not recently. Unfortunately, Heath Ledger did die last week, although I have heard of no tribute concerts in his honor. I've never seen or heard about Letterman playing the guitar. His replacement on NBC, Conan O'Brien, plays guitar on the air frequently.

I recently bought a DVD of "Some Like it Hot," which starred Marilyn Monroe, Jack Lemmon and Tony Curtis. I'd forgotten just how funny it is. At one point Tony Curtis disguises himself as a millionaire playboy in order to win Marilyn's affections. She meets him as he sits in a chair at the beach, wearing a sailor's cap, dark blazer and white slacks. That's the outfit that Letterman wore at the end of Dream 1, save for the psychedelic design added to the pants.

Dream 2: 2 Johnnys

I watched bits of a series on PBS last week called "Pioneers of Television." The episode about talk show hosts was pretty interesting, if overly reverential. It featured some interesting film of Carson in his early days on "The Tonight Show."

Dream 3: Downturn

This dream came out of an "animated discussion" between my wife and me last week. She had wanted me to do something about setting up a savings plan at my current job (something I hadn't gotten around to doing in the first 10 months there, for various reasons, mainly having to do with not liking the plan provided at work) and she let me know that my lack of consistency in carrying out the chores that I've agreed to do is not appreciated. (I've just set up a Roth IRA with monthly contribution and stepped up in the chores department.) Anyway, the concept of this dream is a funny one -- the idea that I used to live in a squalor of "invisible" dust curls, but now that I'm married and know the difference, I notice the dust everywhere. "...Was blind, but now I see..."

Dream 4: Poodle?

I guess I saved the deepest, and strangest dream for last. We grew up at the corner of 34th and Dinwiddie Streets, and my friend Denis lived a few houses down on 34th. His parents were French and Canadian, and they had a poodle. I'm not a poodle fan. I suppose it's not the dog's fault that people shave their coats into such hideous designs. But more than that, the dogs are just too nervous and high strung for my tastes. About a week ago we saw the film "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly," which featured a man whose brain is perfectly fine, but he is trapped in an immobile body, save for one eyelid. I knew how he felt after being trapped in a theater enduring that depressing movie for two hours. Anyway, that story took place in France, and we saw a few flashbacks which showed some interaction between the main character and his kids. The boy in my dream may have been modeled after one of those children.

Dream 4:

Monday, January 21, 2008

Practice Makes Perfect / Champs

Sunday night

Dream 1: Practice Makes Perfect

A Japanese-American police officer sat in his cruiser on a hill about a block away from my old high school. He was probably near the bottom of Harrison Street, just before it crosses Little Falls Road, but somehow it looked a little different than it is in reality. Anyway, the cop was there for a reason. Ronald Reagan was visiting the school, and this officer was one of many who were positioned around the neighborhood to protect him. Reagan had no idea that he was there, of course, and wouldn't have been able to see him anyway, as a wooded children's park separated his side of the block from the school, and besides, he was parked down the hill. Reagan walked over to the school's baseball diamond, and paused at home plate. For no particular reason, he decided that that was a good place to practice his golf swing by hitting a bucket of balls. He was nothing if not consistent; his shots beat the shit out of that police car.

Dream 2: Champs

Two kids, a boy and a girl, each about 12 years of age, had just won a Ping-Pong championship, and were being interviewed on TV. They beamed as the sportscaster looked into the camera, holding a large microphone in one hand, and their weapons of choice in the other. He said, "And this is how they did it -- with sandpaper paddles!"

*****

Dream 1: Practice Makes Perfect

I recently drove around the ball fields at Yorktown in Arlington, and saw that they've been completely revamped. There's a new football field surrounded by a track, and there were two or maybe three baseball diamonds. You could certainly tell that folks in that area are well-off. I've never played a round of golf in my life, aside from Putt-Putt.

Dream 2: Champs

We played many, many games of Ping-Pong in the basement playroom at Mom and Dad's, and we had sandpaper paddles as well as more sophisticated rubber ones. I played a few games of Ping-Pong with the nieces and nephews over the Christmas break, and was surprised to see that they had the exact same 1968 table tennis set that we had; same goofy teenage guy showing off on the cover, same adoring teenage girlfriend in the background, complete with light blue headband and bobbed hairdo.