The Author

Tuesday night

My brother Andrew had just published his first book, a treatise on Constitutional law, and I asked him if I could see a copy. (The family was very excited and proud of him; it was going to be the real deal -- hardback cover and all.) He handed me a copy and I was shocked to see that he'd placed a 20-year-old photo of me on the cover. I was shown wearing aviator-style dark sunglasses, and had slightly longer hair than I do now. I was smiling in the picture because I'd gotten in a little legal trouble at the time, for being a jackass; I'd climbed atop a large statue and gotten busted for it. As I held the book in my hands I reminisced about the incident with Drew. I said, "I guess I deserved it." (I remembered putting my shoes on the statue's face as I scrambled to the top.)

I flipped through the black and white photos in the book, and came across a picture of Bill Clinton, Andrew and me. We'd run into the former president in a diner. He (Bill) was wearing a polo shirt and a baseball cap. I sat next to him, to his left, and Drew was next to me, standing and leaning on the end of the booth.

*****

None of the events in this dream ever happened. Well, I did have aviator frames 20 years ago, but the rest is bogus. My brother has been published thousands of times, but for newspaper articles, not books.

I never met Bill Clinton, but I've seen him twice. On the morning of his first inauguration, in January of 1993, the powers that be closed off I-66, so that he would be unencumbered while riding in a bus from Monticello in Charlottesville to D.C. Some friends and I went to the Vienna, VA Metro station, and stood in the enclosed bridge over the highway to see him pass by on the way downtown. It was strange and eerie, seeing no cars on what normally is such a busy road. After waiting for some time, we saw a cop on a motorcycle in the distance, heading our way. He was followed by several more bikes, and finally Bill's bus came through. He sat in the right front seat, and waved to us and the other folks who had come out to wish him well. I suppose I could say that I also saw him later that day at the inaugural at the Capitol, but we were so far away, I couldn't really see much. I heard him, though.

The only time I saw Clinton close-up was around 1998, when Andrew was invited to a press picnic on the south lawn of the White House, and he asked me to come along with him and my sister-in-law. It was a good time, except for the fact that is was such a hot summer day. There were free hot dogs and burgers, and ice cream, too. At one point the prez strolled out to greet people, and mingle with the families. He was wearing sort of a Hawaiian shirt; short sleeved, with no tie, of course. My first thought was, "He's a big man. He's about a head taller than everyone else." Later I got a blurry photo of him, and managed to get Drew in the frame. Bill was surrounded by chicks, of course.