Wednesday night
I had joined a U.S. Air Force flight school, and walked up to a long rectangular table where I sat down and was introduced to my new training buddy. Instinctively, we both enthusiastically called out "Yeah!", made fists and banged our knuckles together. It didn't work out as we planned. My partner yelled "Ow!" and shook his hand; I had rammed my big high school ring into his finger. Soon, our instructor walked up and said, "Gentlemen, these are your weapons." He proceeded to lay rifles on the table; they were made of chocolate.
*****
At first I thought this was a goofy "Top Gun" parody, but my wife thinks that there's more to it. She says that the chocolate rifle represents the foods that could eventually kill me if I don't keep my cholesterol in check. Interesting. By the way, I was turning the channels around last night, and watched a few minutes of Howie Mandel's game show, "Deal or No Deal." Mandel is a germaphobe, and won't shake hands with contestants, so he touches knuckles with them instead. I'm not sure how that's much different than shaking their hands. Incidentally, I haven't seen that high school ring in years. I remember wearing it while preparing chicken at Gino's. I got flour in the grooves, and it never really looked the same after that. It must be around here somewhere.
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1 comment:
I hope the ring didn't end up in someone's chicken!
I'm a germophobe as well. I've learned to hit elevator buttons with that big middle knuckle. The theory is that you don't slime the work-surfaces of your hands with germs. (yes, I know as well as anyone that no amount of washing gets you germ-free, even if you don't shake hands - clean hands have millions of bacteria on them...).
There are a number of other activities I dislike or avoid on account of the absolute despair that reigns over me when I have a cold.
I think this is the result of colds I got before I got my sleep apnea treated. A cold meant my already-miserable untreated sleep was disrupted even further.
But I still hate getting sick - costs me so much potentially productive time. Me with a cold: that's one miserable bastard.
Hot tips for those not wanting to catch colds:
- Wash your hands (first)
- Wash your face (after washing hands)
- Irrigate with nasal saline twice a day, maybe a little more during cold season, and a lot more if you have a cold (can reduce the discomfort and shorten the duration).
It's been a long time since I've had a serious cold...
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